Maggie Pursglove (Formerly Baker)

Mum will always be one in a million to me.

Mum always said that she was not scared of dying and was involved in clinical research to try to improve medical professionals understanding of and ability to treat uveal melonoma and micro-metastases in the liver. Her hope was that in the future other people experiencing this quite rare cancer may be treated.

The following is what mum wanted people attending her funderal to know about her life. We discussed and wrote it just before she died.

Mum was born Frances Margaret Preston in 1950. She grew up on the Bestwood estate in Nottingham. She attended Grammar School in Nottingham, where she particularly enjoyed sports and was captain of several school teams. At school mum met Shirley, who remained her close friend throughout her life. Mum said that they were like sisters.

Mum worked for the Boots Company in Nottingham, undertaking biological research. She was 1 of 2 Boots employees chosen to go on a 1 month ‘outward bounds’ course. This included canoeing and climbing, which she really enjoyed.

Mum met dad (Paul Baker) whilst working at Kirkby-in-Ashfield Comprehensive School. They married in 1972 on the ‘glorious’ 12th August, at the Church on Rise Park.

This same year mum’s mother became extremely ill and mum (whilst pregnant) gave up her job and moved in with her to care for her until she died, as her father was unable to. The following year (1973) mum’s father became ill and again she cared for him until he died, a short time after I was born.

Mum also became involved in working with disadvantaged young people in Desford and Ibstock Youth Clubs. At the time, her father was horrified that she was working, as she had just got married. She really enjoyed supporting them in developing self confidence through sporting and outdoor activities. Mum continued to do this for 10 years.

Based on this experience, mum retrained and qualified as a Careers Advisor and began working in Coalville, again with disadvantaged young people. Later she worked in Swadlincote and Derby supporting young people with special needs. Mum really enjoyed working with the young people and their parents, supporting and encouraging them to progress in life and reach their potential.

Throughout her working life in the careers service mum met and kept in tough with many friends. Whilst ill, she liked to keep up to date with colleagues who were about to have, and have now had babies.

Dad became ill with stomach cancer in 1995 and mum nursed him through this illness until he died 14.02.1997. The final year was especially difficult because dad remained at home as long as he physically could before moving into LOROS (hospice). Mum moved into LOROS with him.

Mum felt that throughout her married life she had tried her hardest to support dad to reach his potential and goals, and was proud to have done this. They made many good friends and enjoyed many wonderful holidays exploring the UK’s countryside, and occasionally overseas, with their me and my sister, Kate.

Following dad’s death, mum became involved with the Ashby Canal Association. She really liked going on walks along the canal and listening to talks about conservation and the industrial heritage of North West Leicestershire. It was through the Ashby Canal Association that she met Geoff.

Mum and Geoff became friends and married in 2006. Maggie was a keen supporter of the work Geoff was undertaking to get the Ashby canal reinstated. She was often involved in the 'backroom' jobs when festivals, lectures and walks were being arranged. For which Geoff is eternally grateful.

Mum was diagnosed with malignant melonoma in her eye, which was removed, in 2004. Geoff supported her with frequent hospital trips. Mum said she was particularly impressed with his calm and caring approach to this. During her more recent illness, when the cancer spread to her liver, Geoff remained caring and supportive – getting up at 4 or 5am to make tea, toast and the occasional fried egg!

Throughout her married life mum said she never wanted to put herself in front of Paul or Geoff and felt proud to be able to support them with their achievements.

Mum pointed out that she has never seen her life as full of doom and gloom but as a journey with its ups and downs and ultimately satisfying.

She enjoyed many things with Paul, Emma, Kate and Geoff – wonderful holidays, going to folk and music festivals, sailing and travelling around the canal system, visiting castles, museums and enjoying the wonderful countryside in the UK.

Mum said that she was thankful that she was able to support and be there for her daughters Emma and Kate, whilst they achieved both school and university success. She was also proud to see both married, Emma to Paul and Kate to Tim. Mum said she appreciated the support they all provided for the family throughout her illness.

Mum said she felt particularly blessed by the arrival of her grandchildren Oliver (2000), Winifred (2002) and Millie (2006). She was really looking forward to the birth of the next grandchild later this year. Mum said she felt very close to her daughters Emma and Kate and was glad that they were able to care for her throughout her illness and enable her to remain at home.

Mum remained at home throughout her illness, as she wanted to. She died peacefully listening to her favourite radio 4 show, The Archers, with Geoff by her side.

Mum was keen to stress that she didn't want any 'hang wringing' but a respectful celebration of her life. With her help, I hope I have been able to do that.

Above the clouds the sun is always shining...